Friday, June 30, 2006
Unfortunately as you saw, it was by one of their cheerleaders, which pretty much sums up their football program over the past 20 years.
Today we bring you the sad, sad, so-damn-sad-it-hurts (trust us) story of Fateh Mohammed, a prisoner in Pakistan who's serving a four-year sentence for making liquor.
Now, to prepare you, think of the worst day you've had in the last month. Got one in mind? Was it really bad? I mean really awful? Ha! That ain't shit. Not even close. Your "really bad day" doesn't even hold a candle to Fateh's story. You see, that's because Fateh woke up last week with a light bulb in his anus. Yes, you read that correctly - a LIGHT BULB IN HIS ANUS!
But that's not the "best" part of the story -- Fateh claims he has no idea how the light bulb got into his anus and that he must have been drugged. Riiiiiight.
Reminds us of that Fusilli Jerry episode of Seinfeld when Kramer says...
"See, no one wants to admit to them that they stuck something up there. Never! It's always an accident. Every proctologist story ends in the same way: 'It was a million to one shot, Doc. Million to one.'"
How do you say "Million to one shot" in Arabic?
At least that's what they're saying publicly.
We think the real reason they're bolting Eugene is obvious -- those wacky new uniforms the Ducks just unveiled.
Admit it - you'd transfer, too.
Just came across this preliminary sketch of the Big House Renovations, which you have probably seen before, except the stats on the scoreboard caught my eye.
We appear to be playing Western Mich., and the score is tied 44-44 in the first quarter. And amazingly, both teams have gained nor given up any yards. Since special teams yards probably don't count for the offense or against the defense, I can only imagine Stevie Breaston and Western's return man can both run 2.3 40's and have 80" verticals to allow them to trade off returning 7 consecutive kickoffs for TDs. (7 TDs given that Garrett Rivas and Western's place kicker have missed 5 out of 7 extra points, which is hardly a surprise for either kicker.)
Also, it is now 4th & 44 for Michigan, which means that Western eventually caught on and pooched the ball to an up-man on the kickoff, then stopped Max Martin (pictured on the video board) 3 times for no gain. Why we would be playing Max Martin in such a "close" game is beyond me, but maybe Lloyd hoped Martin and Breaston were training together.
Finally, the play clock shows 44 seconds, which would have to be a rule change from the current 30.
If this scoreboard is indeed an indication of the kind of effect the new luxury boxes will have on games at the Big House, I am firmly against them. We don't need luxury boxes to embarass ourselves against Western, instead we could just play the early September game on the road in Kalamazoo.
And folks, if you haven't seen this clip, trust us, he can really ring
Thanks to a reader Sean for the tip.
Thursday, June 29, 2006
We'll say it again and again but, while not exciting or sexy, this issue is very important if you want to get unfiltered access to your favorite sites and not be faced someday with an Internet that is closer to cable TV, controlled by big media companies that can pick and choose "winners" online.
Well, our friends over at Bruin Nation have put up another excellent post on the subject. The telecom bill has moved over to the Senate where it's coming down to crunch time. So check out Nestor's post over there and please contact your Senator about this very important subject.
And as if you needed more reason why you shouldn't want companies like Comcast controlling access to the Internet, some of you might have read about the Comcast employee who was fired for falling asleep on a customer's couch during a house call while - not making this up - being put on hold for an hour by Comcast!
The story came to light because the customer posted a video of the sleeping tech on YouTube. Let's make sure it stays that way and everyday folks continue to enjoy the same access to the Internet as the "big guys."
Ok, we know we already have two YouTube posts up today, but you can't tell the story above without...
Wednesday, June 28, 2006
Gee, why stop at 128? How 'bout just expanding it to 256 teams and include Divisions II and III as well! Yeah, that would be better. Or maybe if a coach asks really nice, let him in, too.
Let me go out on a limb here and say this is the stupidest fucking idea I've heard in a long time. Instead of a selection committee, they might as well just use Evite.
One of our readers tipped us off to the fact that The Buckstache has found it's way into the Urban Dictionary. Just a note of thanks to all the legally challenged Tosu fans, players and players-to-be for making this great honor possible.
Texas Tech had just defeated Oklahoma on the last play of the game in Lubbock. In the tunnel after the game, Fox Sports Net was attempting to interview a Sooner player - "attempt" being the key word. Turns out, an apparently drunk (we hope) fan of the Red Raiders had other ideas...
Note: For some reason, YouTube has flagged this video as potentially inappropriate. However, it's totally safe for work.
Tuesday, June 27, 2006
So after the killing of one of his lawyers last week, former Iraqi dictator and mass murderer Saddam Hussein went on a hunger strike in protest. Being the brave man of conviction that he is, it lasted for - wait for it - one meal.
Yes, one meal.
Gee, what a tough guy. Benny was on a longer hunger strike yesterday when he skipped breakfast because he had to be in the office early for a staff meeting.
How did the conversation go that led to this wild and crazy fun-filled day?...
"Least we don't have to study and read books and shit."
"I wish we could go throw stuff and spit at Michigan fans."
"Gotta wait til November, dude."
"Don't you mean - FUCK MICHIGAN!"
LAUGHTER. HIGH FIVES
"Dude, I got it! Let's go set a Michigan hat on fire!"
"Dude, you so fucking rock!"
MORE HIGH FIVES
"Wait! And let's video tape it!"
Monday, June 26, 2006
Finally, at 3 a.m., he went to the police and asked for help. All he could remember was paying 10 euros for a taxi ride to the city center and that he went past a park and a Mercedes dealer (which is probably a lot like saying you passed a Ford dealership in the U.S.).
The police took the genius to the area that matched his vague description of the city of 500,000 and spent an hour driving his ass up and down streets until he recognized his hotel just before dawn.
After careful study, I'm pretty sure the signal means, "Yost, I want you." Could be wrong. I'm just guessing. But look at the letters tattooed on her back: "B-R-C." I mean, if that doesn't scream code for "Yost," well, then I don't know what does.
Finally, I hope MZone readers appreciate above how I shamelessly attempted to tie this post into college football even though it was a stretch. However, I doubt we'll get many complaints.
It made me think how lucky I am not to play football. No matter how much I work on these expense reports on my desk, I'm not going to tear an ACL doing it. And there's no way I'm going to get a sports hernia, though I once thought I pulled a hammy running for the bus. Plus, it's highly unlikely the guy a couple of cubicles over is going to hit me with the force of a hepped up Ray Lewis.
Of course Joppru is entering the final year of a $3.005 million contract. So maybe football's not such a bad career choice.
Saturday, June 24, 2006
Jim "Hear No Evil" Tressel and Buckeye athletics director Gene "See No Evil" Smith said they were caught unaware when it was revealed that Ohio State's just-hired director of football performance, Eric Lichter, was convicted of a misdemeanor drug possession back in 1998.
Initially charged with distributing Ritalin and Rohypnol, the date rape drug, that felony charge was dropped and Lichter pleaded guilty to possession.
So what happened?
According to Lichter's account in the Columbus Dispatch, "Unbeknownst to me, (the manager at the gym I worked at in college) was involved in drug trafficking. One night he came up to me and said, 'I've got a guy coming, can you hand him this envelope?' and I said, 'Sure, no problem.' It turned out to be a locker key (where the drugs had been stashed)."
Makes perfect sense to the Dispatch. The very title of their story is, "Coach unwittingly caught in drug sting."
Hmmm. Ok. But let me pose a question to you, our loyal readers...
Suppose you go to work tomorrow and your boss says "Hey, INSERT YOUR NAME HERE! Stop reading that goddamn Michigan blog and go give this package to Stevens next door." So, without asking what it is or taking a peek, you go next door and are immediately gang tackled by a team of FBI agents who arrest you for dealing drugs to "Stevens."
Now, maybe I'm being too hard on Mr. Lichter, but if that were me, and I didn't know jack shit about what was in that package I was delivering, I wouldn't plead guilty to ANYTHING. Certainly not a drug possession charge, for cryin' out loud. I mean, if the Domino's delivery kid didn't know the night manager was stuffing an ounce of hash under the pies, should he plead guilty?
Hey, here's an idea: maybe Tressel should bring those drug and bomb sniffing dogs they're so fond of unleashing on the U-M team bus to job interviews at the 'Shoe.
Props to "Concerned Ohioan" and Surrounded in Columbus for the tip.
Friday, June 23, 2006
I hope the soccer fanatics in this country are as upset as I am about the Americans' performance. An 0-2-1 record, only two goals, a listless loss to the Czech Republic, and a loss to unheralded Ghana. Of course, as John Stewart said in last night's Daily Show, "There's no shame is losing to one of southwest Africa's least malnourished nations."
This World Cup was an unmitigated disaster for the U.S. team, and it's a disgrace. I'm not one of these ugly Americans who think that everything in the world is ours due to our birthright. But I do believe we have the best athletes in the world here. We have tremendous resources, love sports, and a huge population of people whose heritage is from the countries where soccer is the number one passion.
I remember in the early '80s how soccer was going to be the biggest sport in this country. That never happened, but just about every kid plays it, and that's been the case for 20 years. Where are the 25 and 30 year olds who were part of soccer's original boom here? I know it's the top sport in most European and South American countries, and sure, if Dwyane Wade, Vince Young, and Derek Jeter chose soccer, we'd probably be taking home the World Cup. But I find it hard to believe we can't find 20 players among the almost 300 million people in this country to be competitive on the world stage. The U.S. women have been able to do it.
I'm not saying the U.S. should win every World Cup, or be in the finals every year. But there's no reason we shouldn't be a player in most international tournaments. Failing to make the round of 16 should be equivalent of Michigan having a losing season - it should happen maybe once in a lifetime. Unfortunately the U.S. soccer team isn't the Michigan of international soccer. We're more like Arizona State. Sure, we qualified for the World Cup, and the apologists will say that's an accomplishment. Kind of like ASU making the Insight Bowl. I think the U.S. should be able to do better than the Insight Bowl.
In it, we were particularly puzzled by the criss-cross tread-looking-things on the sleeves and knees. Where did the inspiration come from? Then, on the way home from work today, Benny literally stumbled across the answer. So simple, so genius. And it just screams college football uniform...
Watching this actually makes us miss Trev Alberts and Beano Cook.
On second thought, we prefer these two knuckleheads.
Thursday, June 22, 2006
RE: Uniform Design 475,892
Dear Duck Fans,
First off, you know we like you guys here at the MZone. Heck, a couple months ago, we named UO fans some of the classiest in the country. And we realize Nike founder Phil Knight is an alum who donates millions to the school, including money for locker rooms which we hear are the envy of NFL teams.
But for the love of God, somebody has to reign in these designs the Nike folks are forcing on you and your team. You guys are a major college football team, not contestants on Project Runway.
I mean, a while back there was that Nike-designed mascot that looked like a rejected villian out of the really shitty Batman movie starring George Clooney.
Now we get sent pix of your latest uniforms...
Sweet mother of Pearl! Where do we start?
First of all, what's with the four different styles? Just so you know, most teams have two - home unis and away unis. Period. Not a different design for each month of the college football season. Christ. You guys have more wardrobe changes than a Madonna concert.
And let's talk helmets. Rule of thumb: use one. Not three. Then again, with four different uniforms, maybe this is restraint.
Finally, can somebody explain the criss-crossed silver things on the sleeves and knees? Seriously. It looks like it was inspired by the metal floors you find on a warehouse loading dock. Either that or tire treads on an F-150. But then that seems to imply somebody ran over your ass which isn't the image a football team usually seeks to portray.
Listen, like we said above, we're big Oregon fans here. My trip to Eugene was fantastic (except for the outcome of the game part). However, according to your school's press release about the new uniforms, this is the 4th major "evolution" of the football duds since Nike starting designing them in 1996. Four big ones in a decade.
Senior tight end Dante Rosario puts it this way, "Those schools, Southern California, Michigan, Notre Dame, Penn State, those teams are known for the tradition they have of not ever changing, however many years they've been playing. Maybe we're known for innovation, trying new things, pushing the boundaries of what people are used to. We're different."
Besides, doesn't anybody realize why Nike changes them so often? So the suckers who bought the 2003 model now have to go out and buy the new crap. It's not about "improving" them. It's about making a buck (or $50 mil in order to put new plasma screens in the locker room).
So please, before Phil has the Ducks taking the field in bright yellow boas and Nike-swooshed tutus, somebody needs to put a stop to this. Stat.
Just trying to help.
Your friends at the MZone
Thanks to reader Colin for the tip.
On the plus side, pool tables also promote hot girl-girl action
Wednesday, June 21, 2006
But the late start, which is unusual for this rivalry, has some positives and negatives that we outline for you here:
Pro: U-M fans driving to the game don't have to get up at 5 a.m. to head to Columbus
Con:The darkness on the drive home will make it harder to spot Ohio state troopers waiting in the median to bust Michigan fans doing 2 mph over the speed limit
Pro: Wolverine fans in vehicles with Michigan license plates have more time to get their windshield/car windows fixed before the game.
Con: Won't have radio to help keep you up on your late drive home because those Buckstache fuckers will probably snap off your antennae, too.
Pro: Due to a longer Hineygate, fans could be passed out/hungover by the second half, reducing the home field advantage.
Con: Since Hineygate will go for an extra three or four hours, fans will be much more drunk and abusive, although their "Fuck Michigans" could be slurred.
Pro: Later start means it'll be warmer at tailgates before game
Con: Later ending means it'll be colder after game so thrown beer bottles will sting that much more leaving stadium
Pro: The bonfires that will start around 7 p.m. (win or lose) will create a wondrous glow over Columbus and provide an earth-friendly source of light.
Con: Smoke in the atmosphere could delay my flight out of that shithole.
Did we miss any? Please add them in the comments section.
Wow. Groundbreaking stuff. Criticizing Carr after a 7-5 season. How does he have the balls to even type such words? I mean, one doesn't see 50 of those stories littering every U-M fan board in cyberspace. Hell, Dienhart could have taken the day off and simply cut-and-pasted from Rivals, Scout or any Fuck-You-Lloyd-Because-You-Don't-Win-Every-Game .org, .net or .com site.
Doubt me? Go try and find any pro-Lloyd threads out there. You have a better chance finding a Republican at a Hollywood fundraiser or some joker still running one of those FireJoePa sites which have suddenly gone silent on the heels of the Nittany Lions 11-1 mark in 2005.
Point is, Michigan fans need to take a deep breath. The sky is not falling. Really.
Before last season, Michigan went to back-to-back Rose Bowls. Yes, the Wolverines lost but keep those defeats in perspective. One of those losses was to a USC team in the midst of something like the third longest winning streak in NCAA history while the other Rose Bowl loss was on the last play of the game to Texas team led by a QB who absolutely shredded that same USC team even worse this past January.
Yes, 2005 was unacceptable. Totally agree. But it was an aberration. Even Dienhart mentions in his story that he "will give Carr and Michigan credit: They never have fallen on their keister like every other major program. USC, Ohio State, Tennessee, Texas, Alabama, Penn State, Oklahoma, Georgia, Miami, Nebraska, LSU, Notre Dame … all of those college football fat boys have had losing records at some point over the past 15-20 years."
Furthermore, Lloyd has totally revamped his staff in an effort to correct the mistakes of last season. So the maize and blue faithful need to relax. It's not as bad as the cyber parrots would have you believe, even those getting paid to write that the sky is falling.
To refresh, last month Holmes was arrested for disorderly conduct following his confrontation with a Miami Beach police officer. Well, that was so May.
Just after midnight on Monday, Holmes was arrested and charged with assaulting a woman. And not just any woman, mind you. But the mother of his 18 week old daughter who put it this way in her 911 call to police...
In the police report, Holmes allegedly choked her, knocked her to the ground and slammed her into a door at the apartment shown below...
Bill Cowher, coach of the Pittsburgh Steelers who drafted Holmes in the first round, had criticized the wideout after his first arrest. No word on his reaction to this latest incident.
Before the NFL draft, Holmes had said he was hopeful that he would go high in the draft so he could support his three children. Yes, you read that right - three. Hopefully the 22 year old Holmes will use some of his frist round draft money to purchase condoms.
Thanks again to all our readers who sent us the tip on this story.
Tuesday, June 20, 2006
Battle of the Super Models? Are you kidding me?
This is worse than those gaudy Rose Bowl t-shirts by grandmother used to buy me for Christmas from Sears when I was a little kid. I think I'd rather get a NASCAR tee as they're more subtle.
My only quibble is they don't have the "Phil Fulmer Variable" which states that if you're still pissed that your never-won-a-title QB lost out on the Heisman, make sure to drop the undefeated team of the actual trophy winner down a couple spots out of spite.
Monday, June 19, 2006
By now, if you're a regular reader of the MZone, you know about The Buckstache, our new name for the mustache due to its popularity among Tosu folks, especially those with legal woes. But while the popular Columbus style has been co-opted by folks who've run afoul of the law, it hasn't always been that way. This is the story of such a man.
One of the earliest proponents of The Buckstache was a rap sheet-less football player so good, he got his picture on a Wheaties box - in high school! However, with his choice of any college in the country this mustache-loving linebacker chose Tosu and coach Earl Bruce where he was a three time All-Big Ten selection as well as a two-time All-American. The man behind the 'stache was Buckeye great Chris Spielman.
Now, while we usually bash Buckeyes mercilessly here on the MZone, we have a hard time doing it with Chris Spielman. First of all, he was drafted by the hometown Lions and was a four-time Pro Bowler for the Honolulu Blue and Silver. But most importantly, Spielman seems to be a heck of a person. When his wife was stricken with cancer in 1999, Spielman took a year off to be with her and even shaved his head to match her hair loss due to chemotherapy. Afterwards, he and his wife used his celebrity to raise millions for breast cancer research.
If only more Buckeyes like Spielman had kept their Buckstaches instead of allowing the Tosu grooming statement to be hijacked by less desirable Tosu folks. Then again, what the hell would we write about in June if that were the case?
Thanks to DevilGrad for the tip.
And Kyle, you think pissing off Gators or Vols is bad, wait til some of the soccer folks show up on your site!
- During the pre-game they took several shots of the fans outside the stadium and it was very reminiscent of the crowd shots during Gameday, with everyone wearing their team's colors, holding up signs to get on TV, singing their team's songs and, of course, partying.
- Though I know not everyone at the World Cup paints their face and wears a wig, it's much easier to get on TV if you do those things. Just like for a college football game.
- During the game, the crowd noise is overwhelming, not only because of the cheering, but also because of the singing and chanting. It might not be Let's Go Blue, or Hang on Sloopy, but it's still pretty catchy.
- Unfortunately, just like many games in college football, the referees have too much influence.
- Every 15 minutes or so ABC would put their "Sports Board" crawl at the bottom of the screen where they'd update scores in other World Cup games. That's all well and good, but when they'd start it up, they played the exact same tune that they use on college football Saturdays. So I hear those familiar notes, and I'm expecting to see an update on the Texas-Oklahoma game, and instead I get Portugal 2, Iran 0. Well, I guess I'm happy about that.
Saturday, June 17, 2006
For some reason, for the last 2+ hours or so, one was unable to access the main page of our site.
See what happens when you piss off soccer hooligans by making fun of their sport? Sheesh.
Sorry for the inconvenience (meaning you probably had to work instead of procrastinate on our site).
The MZone Gang
Friday, June 16, 2006
Yesterday, I put up a post expressing my dislike of soccer. World Cup or not, it bores me to death. One man's opinion (mine) on a blog (also mine).
Well, I was surpised to learn that because I don't like soccer, apparently I'm an ignorant redneck American who drives a pick-up truck and "can't drink for snot either."
Like I said, who knew?
I guess I just didn't realize the thrills I was missing. So I did some checking and boy was I wrong. I mean, looking at the results for Wednesday's clashes, I discovered that in Spain's 4-0 victory over Ukraine, Spain had 10 shots on goal, Ukraine had 2. In Germany's 1-0 thriller over Poland (after German hooligans clashed with police), Germany had 8 shots on goal, Poland had 3. Finally, the big Tunisia-Saudi Arabia 2-2 deadlock saw Tunisia having 2 shots on goal, Saudi Arabia with 5.
Wow. Almost five hours of soccer and six World Cup teams (the best of the best in the sport) produced a grand total of 30 shots on goal. Not 30 goals. Shots!
Pinch me, I can't stand the thrills.
Even crazier, the story of the woman above is remarkably similar to that of FSU football fan Jenn Sterger. As rumor has it, the young Brazilian lady was on her way to the big soccer match when somebody spilled beer all over her and she was like, "Que a foda!" So she just threw on her yellow bathing suit top and took one for the team. No way was this Brazilian bombshell going to miss the game. Hell no!
But wouldn't you know it, when she got to the match, her nipples started to itch. All because of that damn yellow top which she never wore - unless people spilled beer all over her on the way to soccer games. So, she had no choice - like the yellow top itself - but to whip those suckers out.
Now, as luck would have it, the soccer match was being televised by Brazil's largest network, TV Globo. And when a TV Globo cameraman happened to turn his lens her way and Brazilian sports commentator Bernardo Musburger famously said, "Duas razões vir a Brasil" ("Two reasons to come to Brazil) - an Internet sensation was born.
All because somebody spilled beer on this poor girl. All by accident. Just like Jenn Sterger.
Richard's currently working on spotlights of the ACC schools, with the SEC next, starting with Alabama on June 20.
In an effort to make the site even better, Richard's asking for help. Do you know the best place to tailgate? How about the best burger on campus? Or the bar with the best TV setup to watch the games? Drop him a line and let him know.
I know I'll be checking out the site come November before the MZone staff roadtrip to Columbus. Richard, one suggestion - do you think you could include a map to a parking lot where my car with Michigan plates won't be targeted? And maybe a tailgate area where I won't have beer bottles thrown my way because I'm wearing maize and blue? Just wondering.
Thursday, June 15, 2006
Sorry. Can't get on this bandwagon. Because, in my opinion - how can I put this? - soccer blows.
There, I said it. And I feel better getting it out. Because while it may not be "sportically correct," soccer bores me to tears. I'd rather watch grass grow - which I think it actually does during the course of a soccer match.
Sure, soccer fans rave about the "uninterrupted flow" of the game because play never stops for each of the two 45 minute halves. But to me, that's not flow, that's a flaw. Because when the hell am I supposed to take a whiz if the damn game never stops? Even worse, if the game never stops, that means no Bud Bowl. How can you call it the "biggest" sport in the world if there's not a Bud Bowl?
Oh, and what's the deal with that extra time just randomly added at the end of the game? Nobody knows how much, just the refs. Are you kidding me!? You think Penn State fans got bent out of shape about two extra seconds in Ann Arbor last year, JoePa would have a heart attack over this shit.
Listen, if you want to pretend this crap is exciting, go ahead. But any sport where the typical game is 1-0, 2-0 is a rout and 3-1 is an offensive explosion, I guess I don't get all the excitement. So pardon me if I'm not setting my alarm clock trying to catch the big Ecuador-Costa Rica showdown.
Go ahead, flame away with the "you don't get it" comments. But when Brazil, supposedly a team so good its back-ups could have qualified for the Cup, beats Croatia by - you guessed it - 1-0; and the Mighty English beat Paraguay - wait for it - 1-0; I'd rather save my TiVo space for old college football games on ESPN Classic.
But how to do other fans express their dislike of the Maize and Blue? When you're a little classier and don't want to be sporting the f-bomb? Well, if you're an Iowa Hawkeye fan you do it this way...
Even we have to love that one. It expresses dislike, but it in a nice PG/PG-13 sort of way. Although...
Is that a Buckstache he drew on himself?
HT: We can't for the life of us find the email of the person who sent us this picture but you know who you are. But let us know and we'll get your name up here if you want.
But then the Nittany Lions got their biggeest win in years. The stadium was alive and fans were going crazy. This was the type of thing that changes around a bad week, the kind of thing that makes college memorable. Maybe things were going to turn around for poor Nathan Lehman.
Did Lehman celebrate by hugging strangers in the stands? Did he join in a rousing chorus of Fight On State? Did he whip out his cell phone to take a picture of the moment? Nope, none of these. He stormed the field.
OK, there's nothing wrong with that. Most any college student worth their discounted season tickets has done that and it's pretty much required after any half-assed win in college hoops games. But Lehman didn't join a group in trying to take down the goal posts, or seek out the players to give them a pat on the shoulder pads. Instead, this kid with a totally clean record "tackled university police officer Cyprien Brien, punching him in the face and putting him in a headlock that left him with bruised neck ligaments," according to authorities.
Good thing he's religious and doesn't drink.
Lehman, who claimed he just snapped, pleaded guilty to an aggravated assault charge and was sentenced to four to 23 ½ months in prison, with eligibility for work release, and a $1,000 fine.
If this is how Lehman decided to celebrate a win, imagine what he would have done had PSU lost.
Well, based on your comments and emails inquiring about it, you can now purchase your very own "Buckstache" gear in t-shirt, hat, magnet or sticker form.
On the tee, the Buckstache logo is on the front and "Beware the Buckstache" is written on the back. As for the Buckstache hat? It's trucker style. Naturally.
To get one of these dandies for you or that special Buckeye in your life so that his clothing can match his (or her) facial hair, check out our CafePress store.
Wednesday, June 14, 2006
But, thanks to the fine folks over at DEADSPIN, the Ohio State logo has caught a much needed break and finally made an appearance even we here at the MZone can support. Behold:
Since the M Zone has been rigorously piling on our scarlet and grey clad brethren, I figured it was time — if only for pity’s sake — to show another side of Buckeye fandom (consider this the M Zone equivalent of lowering Mike Cooper’s bail from $500,000 to $5,000). And more importantly, I want to wish a speedy and safe return home to Sgt. Knox (in the photo) and his fellow soldiers.
And here’s a suggestion for you Buckeye fans who stop by here from time to time and have the means to accomplish this: Should this young man be “back in the world” — Army talk for being in the U.S. — this fall, it would be really cool for someone to provide him and a few family members with complimentary tickets to The Game on 18 November. If not for his service to his country, then for providing that rare positive image of a Buckeye fan.
ED. NOTE: We agree with Baggy 100% here and even resisted the urge to add the following caption to the picture: "Haven't the Iraqi people suffered enough?" All kidding aside, it's pictures like this that should make us all -- Bucks and Wolverines alike -- appreciate how fortunate we are to be debating college football in the blogosphere while folks like Sgt. Knox are putting their lives on the line day in and day out. A sincere thanks to him and his fellow soldiers.
But I digress.
This blog with the great name (at least if you bleed Green and White) had an article slamming Michigan because Michigan wouldn't play any night games in the new ABC Saturday Night Football line up this fall, doesn't have advertising, blah, blah, blah and whatever else Sparty bitches about this time of year.
However, he did bring up a point I agree with 100%. In his post, SB had a link to a Michigan Daily article from last fall in which Michigan's Athletic Director wrote an email to approximately 2,000 students in the south endzone instructing them to remain seated most of the game!
“We are asking you to respect the other Wolverine fans by not standing for the entire game,” said Martin. "Students standing for long periods of time are subject to removal.”
Apparently, this was sent right before the 2005 Notre Dame game because, during the Northern Illinois game the previous weekend, "there were confrontations between the Michigan students and the fans who were sitting directly behind them" according to U-M Associate AD, Marty Bodnar.
In his post, Spartan Bob ripped into Michigan for that one - and rightfully so. What bullshit! Can you even imagine students in Columbus or Knoxville or Auburn or PICK ONE getting that sort of email from the AD?! No wonder the Big (Quiet) House sounds like the grad library the week before finals and provides the lamest "home field" advantage in all of college football!
As I said in my October 2005 post, "Put the damn keys away!", Michigan fans need to do more, much more, to make the Big House the intimidating venue it should be for opposing teams. Because like it or not, right now it's just embarrassing. And I for one hope folks like the person behind the Spartan Bob blog continue to call Michigan fans out until that changes.
Over the last couple weeks, we'd be lying if we said we here at the MZone weren't getting a chuckle out of all the Ohio State fans, players and players-to-be getting busted for various run-ins with the law. Even funnier to us - the love of the mustache by all these Buckeye perps and pervs. Each one of them was sporting various degrees of the facial hair.
That's why we propose changing the name of the out-of-style-except-in-Columbus mustache to its new, more appropriate name: The Buckstache (or THE Buckstache for Ohio State purists) and giving it its own logo.
For many, many more Buckstache examples, CLICK HERE.